Cancer – An Emotional Rollercoaster

I’ve entitled this an emotional rollercoaster as that is exactly what it feels like. It’s a ride I never chose to get on and one I can’t get off of and have what feels like very little control of the highs and lows – the highs are relative!

I was actually diagnosed with breast cancer coming up to a year ago now (March 2015) and have kept notes and ramblings in my notebook getting off my chest how I feel, but it is really only now I feel emotionally and physically ready to share.

I have started already a little sharing with my recipe ideas but without explanation. For me my diet and the food that I eat was my very first step in gaining some control over this nightmare. Pretty much immediately after diagnosis and being back home I started researching how what we put inside our bodies impact our health, and came across a lot of very interesting articles and books recommending food choices.

Nourish The Cancer Care Cookbook by Penny Brohn Cancer Care
Deliciously Ella by Ella Woodward, Ella’s book introduced me to Kris Carr’s book Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips and Crazy Sexy Kitchen.

I am certainly not about to preach to people that they should only eat organic food and cut out complete food groups but just to say it’s also more about finding the thing for you that helps you gain some sort of control over the situation you are in and I think that relates not only to someone who has been diagnosed with cancer but any scary, out of control situation where your life has been turned upside down.

Louise’s diary – the beginning

It seems very self-indulgent having a page entitled Louise’s diary, who wants to listen to my ramblings plus isn’t the whole point of a diary that it’s private! I recently found an old diary of mine from my teenage years where I had written in code to prevent prying eyes finding out what I was up to or feeling, well I know the code would have worked as I hadn’t a clue what I was banging on about! Don’t worry there won’t be any code here and I am putting modern pen to paper here for therapeutic purpose, as I go through the journey of cancer certain things I just need to get off my chest and if my rambling helps someone along the way I’ll be happy.

I hope to provide a mix of the practical and the emotional, things I’ve experienced and learnt along the way, that at times have seemed like a minefield and I hope this information will help you navigate along your own very personal and individual journey – as I am not naive to presume that any journey is going to be the same but unique to you!

Education – some thoughts …

I found this in my notepad. It is from almost two years ago prompted from my experience of a brilliant parenting course run by the pre-school St Matthews Playgroup, Cotham, Bristol, my son attended then. Reading it now I am surprised by the passion I felt … Having recently been for a teaching interview which held a magnifying glass over the incredible pressures teachers are under in the school system today, what I wrote back then struck a chord … Here is what I said …

lovely depiction of free spirited children by Carolyn Eaton - https://www.flickr.com/people/carolyneaton/
lovely pic by Carolyn Eaton – https://www.flickr.com/people/carolyneaton/

A parenting course I have been attending has awoken a passion in me about what absolute total sense a holistic approach to education makes – instinctively.

Education is a subject that provokes passion in us all … because we care so much about our children’s happiness and ability to succeed in the world we have brought them into.

Feelings in the group ran high during a session I attended recently because we were made so aware of the need to allow children to develop naturally, according to their own individual pace: the need for them to be given the time, the space and the right facilitation and support to understand their emotions and learn to come up with their own solutions to the problems and difficulties life throws at them every day.

And the more we felt the huge importance for those intrinsic skills to be developed, the more we kept questioning the way our education system works. It seems to undermine those needs. It doesn’t appear to be driven by human needs, it feels like more often that not, politics and economics are the driving force for the changes in schools afoot today … ticking boxes, producing mountains of paperwork to prove ‘standards’, squeezing as many children as possible into a class, for as long as possible, getting all parents working i.e. separating children from their home for long periods of time, the place where the most important education should be going on; well, where the secure foundations are embedded from which a child is best disposed to learn.

It all feels very segmented, and seems to be feeding into the hands of Affluenza, that hard hitting book by Oliver James examining the way our skewed modern values based on material desires are affecting our wellbeing. Record levels of anxiety and depression are reported in the ‘have it all’ world we inhabit …

To any human, feeling person who holds a sensitive respect for our world and the people in it, from babies to oldies, surely a holistic, organic, patient and properly nurturing approach to education is the only way forward – the path to ‘quality’ and the best chance of capturing that elusive sense of ‘happiness’ or general contentment to which us humans all aspire.

Thank you to Sue for leading such an amazing course. It had a deep impact!

 

 

 

Orange Muffins with chocolate topping

I’ve been experimenting a lot recently with trying to find healthy cake and biscuit options, I have probably most of the healthy cookbooks you can buy but as my approach to cooking is more take inspiration from recipes and then experiment with what I have in the cupboard I haven’t been very successful on the baking front! My raw chocolate gluten free cookies which won’t appear here when my husband tried them (as they looked yummy) he spat them out, they did taste like bitter chocolate sawdust!

Anyway back to the here and now and what I personally think is a success story (as does hubby as he didn’t spit them out, and Kate whose just had one with a cup of green tea)! First off I have a load of oranges and clementines leftover in the fruit bowl so I googled healthy orange cake to find some inspiration and came across this young food writer Donal Skehan and his Juicer muffins. I didn’t have all the ingredients plus was feeling a bit lazy so have switched things up a bit! Hope you like them!

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Ingredients:

125g self raising flour

75g whole meal spelt flour

200g jumbo oats

2 tbsp mixed seeds

1 tbsp of Linwoods milled flaxseeds, almond, Brazil nuts, walnuts & Q10

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp Himalayan salt

2 tbsp pomegranate molasses

4 medjool dates (stones removed)

250ml unsweetened almond milk

2 eggs

1 whole large orange

1 banana

3 heaped tsp of hard coconut butter

chocolate glaze:

1 tbsp raw cocoa powder

2 tbsp hard coconut butter

2 tbsp honey

1 tbsp maple syrup

Method:

1. Pre-heat oven to 175c and line a 12 hole muffin tin with paper cases (this mixture made enough for 14)

2. Mix all the dry ingredients together in a large bowl.

3. Take your large orange cut into quarters and put in a blender (I use a nutri bullet which makes easy work of skins and blends after 30 seconds into a pulp – I was going to grate the peel first then peel and use only the orange segments but felt lazy so didn’t bother). Add all the other wet ingredients and blitz (this amount of ingredients did take me over the max line of the nutri bullet but no overflowing disasters occurred).

4. Pour wet ingredients into dry and mix all together (I just did this with my mixer then finished off with a spoon.

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5. Put into muffin cases and cook for 20-25mins (I left for 25 and think could have come out earlier).

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6. Whilst cooking make the glaze, melt coconut butter/oil in a saucepan and add honey, maple syrup and cocoa powder. Allow both muffins and glaze to cool a bit before putting on muffins!

Healthy American style pancakes

I was craving pancakes one Sunday morning (no idea why as I was never a regular pancake eater, but wanted a healthy version)

Ingredients:

100g buckwheat flour

200ml coconut water

2 mashed banana

1 heaped tsp baking powder

coconut oil/butter for cooking

Method:

Basically add all ingredients together and mix until all blended together, this will be quite a thick batter consistency. Makes about 4 medium pancakes. I use a small heavy frying pan and cook one at a time, so heat your oil, add 1/4 of the mixture, when bubbles start to appear on surface you know ready to turn over. If you want to keep them warm whilst cooking rest just pop them into a warm oven.

I serve with maple syrup and blueberries but whatever is your thing!

Veg box soup

I’m trying to up my daily fruit and veg so have started getting a veg box weekly and I find it’s useful to make a batch of soup to have for lunches so these veg are very interchangeable depending what’s in your box or to use up leftovers but I always have as a base onion and garlic and good quality veg stock.

ingredients:

drizzle of olive oil

1 large onion

3 cloves of garlic (I’m a big garlic lover and very good for you but adapt accordingly, my husband did say to me one day was I expecting vampires!)

1/2 Kabocha squash (any squash would work)

2 broccoli stalks/stems (I try not to waste anything so I keep broccoli stalks for soups)

2000ml of water

Veg stock (appropriate amount for liquid I use Marigold organic vegan powder stock it’s fab!)

green leafy veg – bag of either Kale, rocket or medium cabbage

himalayan salt (gives flavour but also good for you) and pepper – to taste

Method:

I’m not a precise cook so not a good baker but just love putting stuff together and tasting as I go and adapting.  Fry off onion and garlic in drizzle of oil, you’ll need a pretty large saucepan (I used a big casserole dish) and I gently cook it off on a very low heat. I let this cook whilst I’m sorting /chopping the other ingredients, if onions do start to burn put lid on so they gently steam. Then add squash ( this is seriously tough to chop so need sharp knife to use to peel it as well and chop into large chunks, even though very hard actually doesn’t take too long to cook), broccoli stalks, water and stock powder. Simmer for around 10 mins then add your chopped leafy veg as this doesn’t need long to cook and your seasoning, when all cooked I use a hand blender to blitz!

This is quite a thin soup if you want it thicker you can either add potatoes to thicken or red lentils, you do this after onions are done and lentils need 30mins to cook.

Another option for a health boost and flavour is to add some turmeric, if so I add after onions have softened and fry off a bit but add black pepper at this stage too as I’ve been told turmeric is beneficial only in combination with black pepper!

I have actually managed to get whole family to eat vegetables this way even my 10 and 5 year old boys (without the turmeric) and my eldest is one of the fussiest eaters on the planet!

Enjoy x

Jazz Dames: St George’s: Bristol November 12th

This was a lovely evening. A real tonic. Seven brilliant Bristol ‘Jazz Dames’ accompanied by the also brilliant but ‘tres cool’ and phlegmatic George Cooper Trio were introduced and compered by an effusive Mr Maff Potts.

The foyer/bar felt like a jazz club as soon as you were there – transported from ‘real life’ straight into a heady, relaxing jazz vibe. Bliss. Sipping a glass of red, listening to The George Cooper Trio, catching glimpses of the singers who mingled with each other and the pre-concert crowd, dressed to their jazzy nines and posing for glamorous snapshots, the mood was set for the concert to follow.

Maff Potts was a warm, inviting and flirtatious host. The girls played along, the chemistry on stage between host, band members and singers was fun and infectious. The line up was Emily Wright, Tammy Payne, Katya Gorrie, Nadine Gingell, Lucy Moon, Molly King and Victoria Klewin.  All fab. All different. Lounging on the plush sofas inbetween songs, chatting, laughing, toe-tapping and appreciating each other’s performances, the party on stage was a joy to feel part of  in the audience.

The range of songs – classics from jazz’s ‘Golden Age’ – covered every mood and style, soulful, lyrical, melancholic, cheeky, bouncy, raunchy, fun, solos, duets, and fantastic group numbers. The drama was high and the music was heaven. The standard of singing was tip tip top. Inspiring to hear so many wonderful female voices on stage in one night.

Apologies for not being able to regale you with details of different songs that were sung … this will have to suffice as an ‘impressionistic’ overview review … the music merged beautifully from peformer to performer – and the splash of colour they created  on stage was a pleasure to behold, like a bright painting that just makes you feel happy :). The perfect pick-me-up for a drizzly November evening.

As the launch for the Bristol International Jazz & Blues Festival 2016 it set a promising and enticing tone …

Hoping to see Katya Gorrie again in the Moscow Drug Club at The Lantern, Colston Hall, Thursday January 21st …

 

Romance in Bristol?

Asked to make recommendations for a pair of  young French lovebirds heading to Bristol, I initially drew a blank. Having only lived here as a married gal with children I haven’t really looked at Bristol from this vantage point.

So, it was fun to imagine it as a romantic destination for young love. And, of course, it turns out to have wonderful romantic possibilities …

Continue reading Romance in Bristol?

Bridesmaid on a Budget …

Green and Gold was the original theme and later the bride threw in ‘medieval bling’ …

Well, this is what I came up with …

14651877124_bafc73a102_m Green and Gold Bridesmaid

All from charity shops:

Dress (designer): £18

Shoes: £3

Bag (silk): £3

Bracelet: £1.50

Fascinator: £1.50 (added gold ribbon)

Black shrug/bolero top for evening: £9.99 from MAKE on Gloucester Road

Nail varnish and make-up all from charity shops or mine already

It seemed to go down a treat. The ten of us (yes ten! ) were an eclectic mix of ladies ‘glistening’ in a variety of green and gold frippery as we did a slow march in pairs behind the bride. Elegantly draped in a romantic white gown and veil our friend and bride was led to her groom by her two gorgeous chief (child) bridesmaids, pretty as a picture in their complementary white frocks. The sun shone, the music played and the tone was set for the lovely ceremony that followed … congratulations to Helen and Peter!

 

Delicious celery and feta home-made soup

I made this up today and it is … a hit! Even with the kids. Here’s the recipe:

  • Put a big knob of butter (about 75g) into casserole
  • Melt Butter over medium heat on hob
  • Add red onion – finely chopped
  • Add pressed garlic (couple of cloves)
  • Add a good few celery sticks – chopped up small
  • Mix about and enjoy the aromas
  • Take a good chunk of feta cheese (a third of a standard size squarish pack), and cut into cubes
  • Mix about again
  • Add about a litre of (ideally homemade) chicken stock
  • Add a bit more boiled water from the kettle
  • Season to taste
  • Simmer for 20 mins
  • Leave to cool a bit
  • Mulch with hand whizzer

Yum!! You could garnish with small whirl of cream and bit of flat parsley if you are feeling a bit fancy …

Here it is ...
Here it is …